April 21, 2020
Episode #87 – Paul G. Stoltz – The Response is Everything
“Adversity = life. It’s the most timeless, universal facet of our journey” – Paul Stoltz
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- Show Notes
- [02:08] Patrick introduces his next guest, and old friend, Dr. Paul Stoltz.
- [04:58] A familiar name and voice to the long-time REIN community, Paul briefs us on his elevator pitch with a question to answer the question.
- [06:54] CORE and the Adversity Quotient (AQ). In the face of a world changing event that has produced an adversity-rich environment, Paul provides a narrative for the work he does and the seed from which it naturally grows.
- [10:15] Paul explains that working with people to measure how they respond to and deal with adversity (adversity quotient), then measurably improving it, rewiring and strengthening it, better supports every single interaction of our lives. Consider individuals and organizations with the highest AQ, how can we mimic and master their actions to have a radically better outcome from this most unusual time?
- [13:44] Patrick and Paul talk about how REIN is harnessing this adversity and taking it on to empower the REIN Member community and take a stand for leadership amid the confusion.
- [14:45] The work within the Adversity Quotient book has incredibly far-reaching global impact. Written in 1997, it just went #1 in China in 2019 – 2020. It is also part of the curriculum at Harvard School of Business and M.I.T. Adversity is a universal reality of life. Everyone is impacted by it without exception.
- [19:38] Nature vs. nurture – how is our adversity quotient generally determined? Can it be rewired?
- [22:30] A few new physical distancing terms to add to your toolbox: Zoom Bloom and Quarantine 15!
- [22:54] Paul offers a simple test if you’ve never explored your response to adversity. It starts with five people who know you best and no consequence to their answer. Does that introduction cause you to sweat or get excited?! That may be an indicator.
- [25:46] An equal part of the adversity quotient is not only facing the challenge itself but also how we show up, or don’t, within that challenge. Paul talks about the research they’ve conducted with global leaders around these two concepts. This led to GRIT® Growth, Resilience, Instinct, Tenacity.
- [25:46] An equal part of the adversity quotient is not only facing the challenge itself but also how we show up, or don’t, within that challenge. Paul talks about the research they’ve conducted with global leaders around these two concepts. This led to GRIT® Growth, Resilience, Instinct, Tenacity.
- [35:22] Grit isn’t only about facing the huge mountain and overcoming the challenge. It also comes in the form of everyday challenges, sometimes the hour to hour reality of working at home with your whole family in self-isolation, job loss, someone who is sick. The work is in mastering our core response, particularly as a role model for our family.
- [39:34] Paul circles back to CORE and elaborates on the four dimensions within our adversity quotient: Control (what we can & can’t); Ownership (how likely is your step-up factor); Reach (how far do you perceive this will affect everything else) and Endurance (how long do you perceive this to last or endure).
- [46:37] Paul illustrates CORE within context of what the response to COVID-19 has created and he offers his personal perception of it.
- [46:37] Paul illustrates CORE within context of what the response to COVID-19 has created and he offers his personal perception of it.
- [53:44] Paul outlines some of the qualities that show up in the data for high AQ individuals. At the heart of a high AQ lies a decision to show up, move forward and own the impact you can have on the outcome. Plus, the one concept that ironically doesn’t make sense to individuals with a high AQ!
- [58:56] Paul recounts one of his appearances on the Oprah Winfrey show to illustrate how destructive it can be if we choose to be defined by our adversity, rather than use it strengthen our quality of life.
- [62:38] The great news is there are real ways to start rewiring our adversity quotient to improve it. It starts with tuning into our own CORE response.
- [63:57] Paul shares two moments of truth in his young life that took root and flourished into this 40-year body of work decoding the question “who fails and who prevails?”
- [69:00] Paul speaks about the great influence his parents had in shaping the way he has shown up in the world as an entrepreneur, and in the work he has undertaken.
- [72:00] Patrick is compelled to interrupt Paul to have him share an outstanding story about his grandmother, her essence and how Paul’s first book finally helped her to understand the way she was.
- [78:58] Patrick reflects on his own Mom and some of the great qualities she shares with Paul’s grandmother; qualities that inspire.
- [81:29] Adversity Advantage. When things go wrong, what we say, do and how we show up impacts our relationship with ourselves and our customers. Stepping up in leadership will feel far more powerful than self-victimizing. What do you want your story to be?
- [86:21] Paul talks about Erik Weihenmayer the founder of No Barriers a non-profit organization whose motto is: what’s within you is stronger than whatever’s in your way. Erik embodies the concept of harnessing adversity, going blind at 13, losing his mother one year later then working to become the world’s most elite blind athlete. An amazing story.
- [91:44] What is Paul’s definition of success?
- [92:09] Paul’s daily routine for self-care, optimizing his energy so he has more to energy to give, and mindfully creating space at the beginning and end of his day to share with his wife Ronda.
- [97:08] After gently calling Patrick out, Paul likes to settle into some smooth rapid fire: the book Paul likes to share most (which leads into a cool study Patrick recently participated in which affirmed his youthful disposition aligns with his youthful heart as a result of good habits.) Back to the fire! Favourite inspirational quote; message at the pearly gates; favourite swear word; room-desk-car; favourite streaming series.
- [103:26] Paul’s gratitude.
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